Traumatized youths are quartered in IDP camps in various parts of Nigeria. Among them are Christians, Muslims, Traditionalists, and Pagans. They all have one question in common - why has leadership failed to recognize that lives of ordinary people matter too? There are many innocent kids who heard of Awolowo and wished to get education, some heard of Zik of Africa and wished to learn to stand for unity of Nigeria as giant of Africa, some heard of Sir Ahmadu bello and wished to see a better Northern Nigeria but these kids are saddened by the failure of leadership to protect the innocent and save the dreams of kids.

In the past kids played together in open fields and shared dreams. Kids in Lagos spoke Yoruba as common language. Kids in North spoke Hausa as common language. Kids in South East spoke Igbo as common language. Kids didn’t know tribe and religion or political party. They went to public schools and enjoyed public facilities. In the public schools, the kids were celebrated for their gifts in sports or academics not their fathers money. Failure of leadership created the huge gap between rich and poor and made it glaring that it was a curse to be poor, despite being overly gifted and hardworking. Failure of leadership told poor kids that academic excellence was not necessary and merit was disgusting as the best was reserved for the elite not the endowed, honest and hardworking. The gully between the rich and poor kids has widened because the greed of the failed leaders are unquenchable.

No one saw the pain of poor parents who sold everything to raise just one graduate youth with high expectation that he will get a job and assist in raising his siblings but was conned and trampled to death in the immigration job scam. Failure of leadership quenched the light of hope of the poor like candle in the wind. Youths who survived being trampled have not survived the shock of disbelief that leadership setup job scam to fleece them of fund they do not have. Many parents watch their graduate youths become tricycle operators and constantly harangued by police and treated like scumbags.Donald Trump makes sarcastic remarks about failed leadership in Africa, worse Nigeria and these shameless leaders ignore the harsh truth and call him white faced, pink nose racist.

EFCC has only succeeded in banding huge figures of graft but obtained very few convictions because failed leadership exempt many from facing the justice as they are members of cult of failures who see nothing wrong in corruption as long as the corrupt is on their side.

Failure of leadership did not allow our myopic leaders to see need to build new refineries and stop fuel imports, equip hospitals and stop foreign medical tours, equip schools and save our kids from being exported like cargo, build functional energy supply to encourage industrialization and employment generation.

Has any considered the number of lives lost and financial losses along Enugu Onitsha express way - the only gateway to the South East? Failure of leadership have not allowed leaders of the South East to convoke a meeting to address needs of the teeming youths of the 5 states of the south east who are constantly looking for avenues to vent their frustration..

People should build a hall of shame and put names and pictures of the failed, corrupt leaders in all fields in the website. This will immortalize their evil deeds. These men hide behind religion, tribe and politics to manipulate ordinary Nigerians to fight and kill themselves while they loot our treasury. This nonsense must stop. I am a Nigerian. So are you. In our drivers’ license and international passports, there is NO TRIBE, RELIGION OR POLITICAL PARTY.

 

 

 

This nonsense must stop. Pray for North East. Pray for all the traumatized youths to avoid total psychological breakdown. They all need our love.

Buhari is our president now. Your Excellency Sir, please preside over affairs of Nigeria as a nation. Ignore hate mongers. Woo the south east and South South. You have won elections. No more politicking. Corruption is heinous crime because it is the mother of all crimes. Let the law be upheld in punishment of convicts but work towards better economy and united Nigeria where balkanised and ethnic intolerance reigns supreme.

The South East and South South youths want you to do things to prove the politicians who said that you hate the Igbos wrong. You have your fans in South East and South South. Voice of the majority is not the voice of all.

Bible asked Christians to pray for leaders. Bible did not say pray for your leader if he is a believer and from your ethnic group or political party. Bible says Pray for the leader.

Slander is evil. It is the worst you can do to anyone. Politicians have slandered each other and the leaders of the regions have brought in youths as canon fodders for the fight and it has led to tribal hate. There is grave danger ahead if this is not curbed. I am a Nigerian, not an American. I love Nigeria.

American passport makes a Nigerian in the USA a citizen by law not by GENE. Real Americans know us as Nigerians living legally in the USA not as Americans, this is why Donald Trump said he will send all of us parking if he wins. South Africans murdered us. We only did evil to Ghanaians when we sent them parking at their trying time. Now, the whole World sends us parking and calls our Youths criminals. This is bad. Let us fix Nigeria and enjoy our peace here. A functional Nigeria is the best place to be for all Nigerians.

Your Excellency sir, if you can ask the Europeans, Arabs and Americans for list of bank accounts where our corrupt politicians stashed ill-gotten money, can’t you ask for list of Boko Haram sponsors? Our former president, GEJ said earlier he has it. We need these men punished. They have wasted far too many lives to spared one day extra. We need them investigated, tried, and convicted.

When judiciary fails, jungle justice will rise. Watch and see. Lies have expiry date. Soon wool pulled over the eyes of Nigerians by failed leadership will be taken off and the corrupt will be brought to jungle justice.

To the corrupt I say this as a prophet, return our stolen money and save yourself and family, else the wrath of the people will fall on you soon. The sick can exercise patience with the doctor, but not the hungry with the cook because he will go to check if it is stone that is being boiled or yam. The hunger is increasing, so is the anger. Many civil servants are being fired in the midst of economic doom. Anger is brewing. Just watch and see. No hiding for the wicked and the corrupt. You are known. Your palaces give you out. Even your police security hate you for playing god, while his kids are constantly harassed for school fees because you diverted funds for public school and made private school with unqualified teachers the better choice for the poor.

It’s me talking,

Evang Chinedu Nwoye

 

Once upon a time in a faraway land, there lived a Chinese wise man and his disciple. One day in their travels, they saw a hut in the distance. As they approached they realized that it was occupied in spite of its extremely poor appearance.

In that desolate place where there were no crops and no trees, a man lived with his wife, three young children and a thin, tired cow. Since they were hungry and thirsty, the wise man and his disciple stopped for a few hours and were well received. At one point, the wise man asked: “This is a very poor place, far away from anything. How do you survive?”

“You see that cow? That’s what keeps us going,” said the head of the family. “She gives us milk, some of it we drink and some are made into cheese. When there is extra, we go into the city and exchange the milk and cheese for other types of food. That’s how we survive.”

The wise man thanked them for their hospitality and left. When he reached the first bend in the road, he said to his disciple: “Go back, get the cow, take her to the cliff in front of us, and push her off.”

The disciple could not believe what he was hearing. “I cannot do that, master! How can you be so ungrateful? The cow is all they have. If I throw it on the cliff, they’ll have no way to survive. Without the cow, they’ll all die!”

The wise man, an elderly Chinese man, took a deep breath and repeated the order: “Go ahead. Push the cow off the cliff.” Though outraged at what he was being asked to do, the student was resigned to obey his master.

He returned to the hut and quietly led the animal to the edge of the cliff and pushed. The cow fell down the cliff and died.

As the years passed by, remorse for what he had done never left the disciple. One spring day, the guilt became too much to bear and he left the wise man and returned to that little shack. He wanted to find out what had happened to that family, to help them out, apologize, or somehow make amends.

Upon rounding a turn in the road, he could not believe what his eyes were showing him. In place of the poor shack there was a beautiful house with trees all around, a swimming pool, several cars in the garage, a satellite dish, and on and on. Three good-looking teenagers and their parents were celebrating their first million dollars.

The heart of the disciple froze. What could have happened to the family? Without a doubt, they must have been starving to death and forced to sell their land and leave. At that moment, the student thought they must all be begging on the street corners of some city.

He approached the house and asked a man that was passing by about the whereabouts of the family that had lived there several years before. “You’re looking at it,” said the man, pointing to the people gathered around the barbecue.

Unable to believe what he was hearing, the disciple walked through the gate and took a few steps closer to the pool where he recognized the man from several years before, only now he was strong and confident, the woman was happy, and the children were now nice-looking teenagers.

He was dumbfounded, and went over to the man and asked: “What happened? I was here with my teacher a few years ago and this was a miserable place. There was nothing. What did you do to improve your lives in such a short time?”

The man looked at the disciple, and replied with a smile: “We had a cow that kept us alive. She was all we had. But one day she fell down the cliff and died. To survive, we had to start doing other things, develop skills we didn’t even know we had. And so, because we were forced to come up with new ways of doing things, we are now much better off than before.”

Moral of the story:

Perhaps the best thing that could happen to you is to push your “cow” down the cliff. Once you free yourself of the thought “it’s little but it’s certain,” or of that idea “I am not doing great but there are people who are much worse than me” — then your life will really change.

Is there a cow in your life that is keeping you miserable?  Throw the cow off the cliff!

Author: Colin Nwoye

It is a sad reality that media broadcasts and social media are doing Nigerian internet savvy youths more harm than good. You cannot hate and be successful. Despite the sad challenges of life after the Civil war, igbos went back to North, South west and all ends of Nigeria and took advantage of the low market penetration of goods in those regions and as committed entrepreneurs, within less than two decades igbos emerged as the richest tribe in Nigeria through trade. It is on record that Igbos own large chunk of properties in all major commercial cities in Nigeria and are the most geographically spread out tribe in Nigeria. Igbos are doing exploits in many parts of the world. Media propagandists only show few igbos who have jumped on to quick wealth syndrome in Europe and are disgrace to the tribe. They rarely show those who are champions of change and celebrated icons in various fields. It is pure envy. It is understandable. The over- zealous military coupists killed select leaders of Hausa, Yoruba tribes, but duo of Yoruba and Hausa jointly promoted the hate that saw Gen Ironsi murdered, thousands killed in ethnic cleansing in the north and worse for few Hausa men and Yoruba men, over 2 million Igbos were slaughtered, their bank deposits reduced to nothing and 45 years after, the tribes still want to push igbos into another unnecessary carnage. If China is one country but with provinces (regions), USA, India, Brazil as one country, Nigeria unity is a blessing if harnessed at regional level.

The children of fathers who saw carnage of civil war has more education than their fathers but less development in entrepreneurship that Is why many are still wallowing in pain and confusion after graduation. Some in confusion, have taken up jobs in 2016 to feed that their parents who survived the war with 20 pounds from the bank and no roof over their heads cannot accept in 1971. Entrepreneurship mindset is Millionaire mindset. A millionaire mindset is all that is required to see beyond momentary challenges and fashion out solutions. The world pays for solutions, not certificates. We are all using facebook because a brilliant mind discovered the need for human beings to bridge communication gaps in less expensive and interactive way. We are happy for facebook founder. We are happy for Steve Jobs, Apple products. We are happy for Bill gates, Microsoft. Solution mindset blinds color and race challenges. Obama told Americans ‘Yes we can’. Americans closed their eyes to his dark color, worse his first rate African descent. Quote me, in Nigeria people would have denied a brilliant mind like Obama from being a Counsellor talkless of a President, because by Nigerian thinking, HE IS NON INDIGENE. HE IS KENYAN BECAUSE HIS BIOLIGICAL FATHER IS UNDENIABLY KENYAN, WORSE HE HAS MUSLIM ROOTS AND THERE IS AL SHABAB IN KENYAN. A mischievous mind will create photoshop pictures of Obama with hooded, gun wielding terrorists and call it political mudslinging. But Americans in their desperation to find solutions to their economic woes gave their ears to Obama and discovered he is one of the brightest minds, ready to be president.

All over the world, entrepreneurs are celebrated more than employees. Certificates qualify you for employment, but you need creative mindset, character, integrity, communication skills, knack for hardwork to succeed in the market place as entrepreneur. Our parents got more than mere certificates through loving relationship with people of other tribes that is why Igbos are the most diverse in speaking other tribes' language and understanding and tolerating other tribes' culture. Nigeria youths now preach hate. We are just seeing the beginning of the effect of hate messages. Soon troubled youths will kill innocent poor peopleof other tribes they find in the streets

I do not envy an Almajari because he receives benefits from federal government. I do not envy Agbero because he is omonile. I am a giver and givers never lack. I am hardwired for success and those who have this mentality do not pick crumbs and call it government benefit. Genuinely hardworking US citizens do not envy street bums living on social security and food stamps. No. They do not.

Government failed the Igbos in meeting with the promise of Reconstruction, Rehabilitation and Reintegration after the civil war but God did not fail Igbos in blessing the works of their hands. Today, Nigeria has banned many items to reduce the pull on naira for dollar exchange so as to encourage local production. Igbos wake up. It’s time to bring your ingenuity to create solutions to meet the needs of Nigerians. Igbos built most markets in Nigeria with no government support and they own it. Igbos are not criminals. They are hardworking geniuses, travellers and friendly people. Youths stop the hate of fellow Nigerian youths. Hatred will make you to fail. No man hates and succeed. Openly hate dishonest politicians, kidnappers, deceitful contractors who do shabby work, importers of substandard health products, Arsonists who destroy Government installations at least provocation, etc.

OPC is government recognized Agbero of Yoruba tribe, AYC is government recognized agbero of Hausa. NDVF and MEND of Niger delta were armed and made open threats to federal government and got AMNESTY after blowing up pipelines, kidnapping expatriates and attacking military base. It is strange that protection of Igbo youths fall on deaf ears and unarmed youths are being shot by security forces. Under what pretext do our paid security use maximum force to disperse unarmed and peaceful protesters?

Many of these youths are graduates. They need the love of government. They are seeking direction. They are simply saying show us love or give us a new nation so we can go and start a better life. We are frustrated. We are treated like scumbags. Five years after graduation, many youths are still being fed by their parents. Worse, the N5000 APC campaign promise is like 5 years of lost hopes after graduation. Unemployed graduate youths need mentoring on entrepreneurship not N5000. South East has the highest number of graduates, unemployed and under- employed youths! That is a large unused potential for development that is unharnessed!!

I pray all state governors of south east, speakers of houses of assemblies, commissioners of youths, commissioners of police, chairmen of traditional rulers council convoke a meeting to look at ways of harnessing the youth population to revamp south east economy as region before many turn to crime out of frustration. It is less expensive to train youths to become productive, tax paying citizens than to buy guns to curb youth unrest and violent crimes. Kidnapping was a major challenge to South East. We do not want worse arsonists under the guise of agitation.

Engage the youths now. Pope addressed the youths in Italy. He prayed for peace. Words create wars. Words create peace. Words are the most important ingredient in dialogues for peace. Words are not cheap. N5000 is cheap. Where the word of a king is, there is power. President Buhari, speak to youths with love. Late Yaradua won the Niger Delta youths with words from a sincere heart. President Buhari, Ignore APC/ PDP, speak to youths of south east. Arrange for a dialogue and visit Enugu as the centre of South East and speak to youths at the stadium. This will open doors for visit to other stadiums in the South East to address the youths. In IGBO CUSTOM, SORRY THEY SAY DOES NOT MAKE PHYSICAL INJURY TO HEAL, BUT IT HEALS EMOTIONAL WOUNDS. I LOVE YOU AND I HATE YOU. THESE ARE BOTH THREE WORDS THAT CAN CAUSE WAR OR BRING PEACE. 

PRESIDENT BUHARI, TELL IGBO YOUTHS OPENLY THAT YOU LOVE THEM. SAY IT. AFTER HAVING MANY KIDS, WOMEN ARE WOUNDED IN THEIR HEARTS AND KIDS EMOTIONS ARE FRACTURED, IF THE FATHER OF THE HOUSE RARELY SAYS I LOVE YOU.

President will be amazed how growing hatred in Nigeria will be dispersed in one day. President Buhari, you enjoyed excellent military career as a Nigerian youth. You got employment at youth age. Nigerian youths are facing dire straits as unemployed graduates and worse they only see good cars driven by either sons of the corrupt or youths who commit crimes in foreign countries. They are caught in between life of hopelessness and life of Crime. Bring the youths off the trap to light of hope of new Nigeria that is your dream.

Hate ranting, hate crimes. KKK is emerging again and people are proud to wear their hoods representing hooded minds. BLACKS CRITICIZE OSCARS. It is all because some desperate white folk wants to be president by first castigating all good efforts of an outgoing black president to return USA to its former place of glory in comity of nations. America may be thrown back to its dark years in history cause of hate ranting. America has sophistication in security technology to curb and arrest criminals, yet protests because of police brutality along racial lines have been difficult to contain.

WHAT ABOUT NIGERIA? LORD, I PRAY FOR NIGERIA. I LOVE NIGERIA. THIS IS MY COUNTRY. I LOVE ENUGU STATE, GOD’S CITY ON THE HILL AND THAT'S MY STATE. IT IS COMMANDED TO PRAY FOR YOUR LEADERS. I PRAY FOR MY PRESIDENT, FOR MY GOVERNOR AND FOR ALL LEADERS

Lasting change starts with change of mind of the youths to see good in Nigeria and in vision for Nigeria as good people, great nation. This is doable. A stitch in time saves nine.

I challenge everyone on the internet to start putting good write up about Nigeria and perception by people will change to that of - ‘Nigeria, good people, great nation’.

Do it now.

A servant in His vineyard

Evang Chinedu Nwoye

 

 

Awolowo was (37), Akintola (36), Ahmadu Bello (36) Balewa (34) and Okotie-Eboh (27),Enahoro (27) when they led the struggle for independence after the death of Macaulay. Only Zik was 42 at the time.

In 1966, the first coup was led by: Kaduna Nzeogwu (29) and countered by Murtala Mohammed (28), Theophilus Danjuma (28), Babangida (25), Nanven Garba (23), Sani Abacha (23), Shehu Musa Yaradua (23), and brought into power Gowon (32), Ojukwu (33) ,Obasanjo (29), Buhari (24). Most of the military administrators who governed the states under the successive military regimes, most of whom are governors now, were under 30 years.

The brief democratic dispensation which interjected the military interregnums also saw the House of Representatives in particular populated by majority of members under 30 years as well as some senators. Under 30s
were also not in short supply with appointments, we have examples of MT Mbu who became foreign affairs minister at 28 and Pat Utomi who became a presidential adviser at 29 and so on and so forth.

NOW:
Why is it that this age bracket is today still sleeping in 3 seater chairs in their parents’ homes?
Why is it that this age bracket is today still collecting pocket money from their parents?
Why is it that this age bracket is today still writing JAMB?
Why is it that this age bracket is today still sagging their trousers?
Why is it that this age bracket is today still searching for jobs, not yet married?
Why is it that this age bracket is today no longer qualified to even be leaders of youth wings of political parties?
Why is it that this age bracket is today so docile?
Why is it that this age bracket is today still incapable of feeding itself?
Why is it that this age bracket is today barred by law from even aspiring to certain political offices?
Why is it that this age bracket is today incapacitated, unwilling, unable and incapable of asking questions?

Nigerian youths!
Now is the time for the intellectual revolution!

WAKE UP NIGERIAN YOUTHS!

Author: John Faluyi

 

This slow President Muhammadu Buhari ....

Looks like there are some advantages in being slow and staying focussed. Here are some proofs:

Megawatts of supplied electricity are constantly increasing in Nigeria. Some areas have experienced uninterrupted power supply for months now and giving testimonies!

Buhari is slow, foreign reserves are growing. The records are there for all, including doubters, to verify!

This Buhari is slow, but NNPC and NNLG are crediting fund into FG account, even though no Petroleum and Finance Minister yet. 
Even dead refineries have been given a kiss of life and running!

This Buhari is very slow, but state Governors were given N413.07 Billion to pay unpaid salaries of workers in their states. Yet some felt that money should have been added to their wardrobe allowances!

No doubt Buhari is slow, but EFCC and ICPC are busy arresting suspects and charging them to court.

We are having some corrupt individuals abandoning the duties we elected them to do, and out of idleness or stupidity, forming a herd of anti-corruption crusaders, accompanying an accuse summoned by EFCC! This is strange!

Nooooo, he is very slow but US and other European countries have started freezing accounts of our looted funds. News reached us, among other revellations, that a whopping sum of $480m looted and stashed away in an account has been secured for release to us by the American Government.

Also, a Minister under the disgraced leadership of "Badluck" Jonathan, appearing like a monster with many heads, kept $6billion of looted state money in just one account! 
We will need that money back! But come to think of it, if this President Buhari should be fast what do you think will happen?

Fellow Nigerians ....
On September, 22, 2013, Ex-President Goodluck "Ebola", sorry Ebele Jonathan visited America to have a political discussion with Obama and 547 delegates travelled with him! Some days ago, President Buhari also went to same USA to see Obama and only 33 delegates wentwith him!

Now the  differences:.

Only Ex-President Jonathan was lodged in Pierre Hills Hotel across from New York’s Central Park in a Presidential Suite that cost Nigeria at least $10,000 (amounting to almost 1.8m Naira) per night, and the Clueless One spent five days in the hotel! Only God knows how much was spent in the hotel accommodation of the rest 547 delegates that went with him!

1.8million Naira X 5 days = 9 MILLION naira (only for the Clueless One accommodation only)!

Some days ago, President Buhari also travelled to USA to have some discussions with same Presudent Obama and President Buhari modestly chose to stay in Blaire House and a single dollar was not spent! Translated in monetary terms, it means President Buhari just saved several millions of naira of Nigeria's Federation Account!

For those of us keeping faith with this new leadership, thank God we are part of the pen revolutionaries that helped
sent that Extravagant, Shoeless and fake Zoologist and clueless Fisherman back to his creek Otuoke. We are getting good results!

My sponsored Advertisement:

There is a huge task facing the nation now in regards of dearth of credible candidates to take up Ministerial posts.

If only Ministers in churches were acceptable, we would have supplied more than the nation needs! For we have them in abundance, only that credibility may still be an issue!

We need to help this leadership in the search for capable, credible and trusted hands to complement the efforts of this administration. We should consider recommending those we spotted, having credible and verifiable CV.
But please remember that for any person put forward, your credibility may suffer a diminish if found to be less trustworthy, as the yams are now few!

The search must not be limited to the shores of Nigeria alone, and good people must not be exempted on the premises of their political loyalty, as long as they are ready to key in into the vision of this administration.

Let the search begin.

A very good friend, Kofo Sholagbade, aka Kofoshi", shared these information about the advantages of a slow President, but I added some "ajasa" to increase the aroma, without forging any house rules!

Authors: Kofo Sholagbade and Segun Anjorin

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Sugar Ladies ‘n’ Sugar Boys in grey hair.

Written by Amara…published with courtesy of Faluyi John

You have a boyfriend or sugar daddy who is not ready to take you as a second wife (if you believe in that) and is not willing to let you go. Suitors are coming and you are busy enjoying the wealth and affluence. You look at them as small boys who shouldn't come anywhere close to you. Your sugar daddy is by the corner asking why you want to get married. He has even promised to make you a "bigger" babe. You have agreed with him and you believe you don't need the marriage of a thing. I put it to you that you are one of the most foolish people on earth even when you believe you are smart. One day, you shall wake up to know that you missed the most beautiful thing in life. Your sugar daddy who is telling you not to bother about marriage is married and have grown up children. He travels with you and goes about his business while all you do is wait for him in the hotel room to return. He can only be with you for as long as your body is fresh. Give yourself some years and he is gone in search of a younger blood. Why can't you be wise and settle for a man who will stand by you through thick and thin?

Sugar daddy is not the only one singing those tunes in your ears; some old cargoes and demonic agents on social media are gradually leading you to hell and misery with their updates that are devil inspired. They make you believe you don't need a man if you are successful. You watch some society women and celebrities live like they don't need a man. I won't believe any woman who tells me she doesn't need a man. It's two things: either she is afraid to have a real man to call a husband because she knows she cannot handle him or she simply can't have a man. And mind you; many of them are now sick and so they need fellow women more than they need men. What they should tell you is that they don't want a real man; they have boys who warm their beds for material gain while the sugar daddy is by the corner dropping the cash. And I hope you know what is in vogue for them-doing all kinds of fetish and demonic things for influence, wealth, and power. Since they are your role models, please get ready to do it their way. But have it at the back of your mind that every Satan's gift has an expiry date and when it comes, it's with tears.

If you continue the way you live now, you shall join the league of women who pay boys to warm their bed instead of having a real man to proudly call their own.

Be wise! Women need men as much as men need women.

 

By Banjo Ayeni

I have heard so many stories about the struggles and challenges of single parents, this prompted me to salute all the single parents out there.They toil day and night to perform dual role in raising their lovely kids, I salute you.

Some single parents work two jobs to put food on the table for their family, I commend you.

Single parents have more pressure and challenges in raising kids especially in this age where there are so much peer pressures, I salute you.

Single parents rather starve instead of their kids, I commend you.

You hide your pains of being a single parent to your kids, sometimes you cry alone in the dark, but you make sure these beautiful kids don't see you in the state of depression, you still smile with them. I salute you.

How about when you are struggling financially and there is no one to run to? You end up eating whatever is left over in the house.

When your car breaks down, who did you see?

So many single parents have high sense of discipline when it comes to dating or finding a mate, because they want to make sure they are doing the right thing, not only for themselves but also for the kids, they are very cautious on who they bring around the kids. I salute you.

A lot of single parents are not respected in our society just because they do not have a better half, in most cases it's not their fault. They don't deserve this.

But I have something in my mind to tell you single parents, these kids see your struggles, commitments, unconditional love and total affection you are giving them everyday.I am sure they look at your face sometimes and said I LOVE YOU MOM OR DAD.

YOUR LABOR WILL NEVER BEEN IN VAIN! YOU WILL REAP THE FRUIT OF YOUR LABOR. THESE KIDS WILL LIFT UP YOUR SOUL WHEN YOU ARE DOWN AND LONELY.JEHOVAH GOD WILL CROWN YOUR EFFORTS AND SWEATS WITH JOY AND HAPPINESS.

Proverbs 22:6 admonish us:"Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it." Keep them abreast of God's word, let them have a good relationship with our Creator and all other things will fall in places.

 

LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS

By Faluyi John

Friends, Let me add the benefit of my time as a then resident in the UK - and I live in Lagos now. The first thing that I discovered about UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves - including the children of millionaires amongst them. It is the norm over there - regardless how wealthy their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same - the exception being those of us status-conscious Nigerians.
I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline)speaking on the Biography Channel and, to my amazement, he said that his young children travel in the economy class -even when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in Pound Sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children from Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in the UK . No other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached to the office of the prime minister in the UK - he travels on BA. And the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for her exclusive use. 
These practices simply become the culture which the next generation carries forward. Have you seen the car that Kate Middleton(the wife of Prince William) drives? VW Golf or something close to it. But there's one core difference them and us(generally speaking). They (even the billionaires among them) work for their money, we steal ours! 

If we want our children to bring about the desired change we have been praying for on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let's begin now and teach them to work hard so they can stand alone and most importantly be contented, and not having to "steal", which seem to be the norm these days.

"30 is the new 18", which seem to be the new age for testing out the world in Nigeria now. That seems to be an unspoken but widely accepted mindset among the last 2 generations of parents in Nigeria . 

At age 18 years, a typical young adult in the UK leaves the clutches of his/her parents for the University, chances are, that's the last time those parents will ever play "landlord" to their son or daughter except of course the occasional home visits during the academic year.

At 21 years and above or below, the now fully grown and independent minded adult graduates from University, searches for employment, gets a job and shares a flat with other young people on a journey into becoming fully fledged adults.

I can hear the echo of parents saying, well, that is because the UK economy is thriving, safe, well structured and jobs are everywhere? I beg to differ and I ask that you kindly hear me out.
For me, pocket money stopped at age 22, not that it was ever enough for my lifestyle to compete with Paris Hilton's or Victoria Beckham's. Meanwhile today, we have Nigerian children who have never worked for 5 minutes in their lives insisting on flying "only" first or business class, carrying the latest Louis Vuitton ensemble, Victoria 's Secret underwear and wearing Jimmy Choo's, fully paid for by their "loving" parents.

I often get complaint from anxious parents, my son graduated 2 years ago and is still looking for a job, can you please assist! Oh really! So where exactly is this "child" is my usual question. Why are you the one making this call dad/mum?

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I am yet to get a satisfactory answer, but between you and me, chances are that big boy is cruising around Lagos with a babe dressed to the nines, in his dad's spanking new SUV with enough "pocket money" to put your salary to shame. It is not at all strange to have a 28 year old who has NEVER worked for a day in his or her life in Nigeria but "earns" a six figure "salary" from parents for doing absolutely nothing. 

I see them in my office once in a while, 26 years old with absolutely no skills to sell, apart from a shiny CV, written by his dad's secretary in the office. Of course, he has a driver at his beck and call and he is driven to the job interviews. They have a fairly decent conversation and get to the inevitable question - so, what salary are you looking to earn? Answer comes straight out - N250,000.00. Asked if that is per month or per annum?

Of course it is per month. Oh, why do you think you should be earning that much on your first job? Well, because my current pocket money is N200,000.00 and I feel that an employer should be able to pay me more than my parents. Trying very hard to compose oneself, over parenting is in my opinion the greatest evil handicapping the Nigerian youth. It is at the root of our national malaise. 

We have a youth population of tens of millions of who are being "breastfed and diapered" well into their 30s. Even though the examples I have given above are rom parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be observed from Abeokuta to Adamawa! Wake up mum! Wake up dad! You are practically loving your children to death! No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have a society of young people who have been brought up to expect something for nothing, as if it were a birth right.
I want to encourage you to send your young men and women (anyone over 20 can hardly be called a child!) out into the world, maybe even consider reducing or stopping the pocket money to encourage them to think, explore and strive. Let them know that it is possible for them to succeed without your "help".

Take a moment to think back to your own time as a young man/woman, what if someone had kept spoon feeding you, would you be where you are today? No tree grows well under another tree, children that are not exposed to challenges, don't cook well. That is why you see adults complaining, "my parents didn't buy clothes for me this christmas", ask him/her how old-30+. Because of the challenges we faced in our youth, we are where and what we are today, this syndrome-my children will not suffer what I suffered is destroying our tomorrow. Deliberately reduce their allowance or mum-don't cook on Saturday till late afternoon or evening-do as occasion deserve.
I learnt the children of a former Nigerian head of state with all the stolen (billions) monies in their custody, still go about with security escort as wrecks. They are on drugs, several times because of the drug, they collapse in public places. The escort will quickly pack them and off they go, what a life. No one wants to marry them. Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young.- Henry Ford. Hard work does not kill, everything in Nigeria is going down, including family settings. It is time to cook our children, preparing them for tomorrow. We are approaching the season in Nigeria where only the RUGGED, will survive. How will your ward fare? 

If the present generation of Nigerian pilots retire, will you fly a plane flown by a young Nigerian pilot, If trained in Nigeria ? People now have first class, who cannot spell GRADUATE or read an article without bomb blast! Which Way Nigeria !, Which Way Nigerians!! Is this how we will ALL sit and watch this country SINK?

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 Each time we hear of abusive relationships the first thing that comes to our minds are the numbers of our women that are abused physically or emotionally in their relationships by their husbands .  But my probing and honest question is: CAN MEN BE ABUSED IN RELATIONSHIPS BY WOMEN?. My answer is YES!

 When a man is being verbally abused by a woman, I call it spousal abuse.  When a woman nags at every opportunity she has, that's abuse.  When a man is not appreciated for little things he provides for the family, that's spousal abuse.  When a woman compares his man to others in term of material achievements, that is emotional abuse.  When a woman has a little edge financially over her husband and in essence takes an advantage of that to disrespect the man of the house, that is an abuse.  A woman that cheats on her husband is highly abusive and very deadly.

I have seen so many of our men decided to go outside to "explore" not because they wanted to do so but the house is no longer a home. This has led to untimely death of some, some have turned to become drunkards, drug addicts or contacted STD including deadly HIV or AIDS. Some develop high blood pressure that eventually leads to stroke and untimely death.  Proverbs 19:13 says,

 A QUARRELSOME WIFE IS LIKE A ROOF THAT NEVER STOPS LEAKING......

 Some lost all they laboured for because the house has become a leaking roof and inhabitable due to the fact that a woman that supposed to give the support has decided not to follow the injunction in the bible when it comes to relationship.

 Proverbs 18:22 also reads:" THE ONE WHO FINDS A GOOD WIFE HAS SOMETHING GOOD AND HE RECEIVES JEHOVAH'S FAVOR". I am far from being an expert in relationships, but the recent events from people very close to me prompts me to write this. He who knows it feels it. Unfortunately, this has led to so many broken homes and our kids that are supposed to be raised lovingly by two parents are subjected to bear the scars of a broken home for the rest of their lives, the last time I checked the adage says TWO HEADS ARE BETTER THAN ONE.  Let the word and fear of God mould our marriages/relationships, and who we are as an individual.

Finally I will leave you with the letter of Apostle Paul to the congregation in Ephesians 4:31 it reads:  "LET ALL ANGER AND WRATH AND SCREAMING AND ABUSIVE SPEECH BE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU".

 Can we all get along?

 I SAY NO TO SPOUSAL ABUSE, PHYSICAL OR EMOTIONAL!

 Have a fun-filled and purposeful week friends.

Author: Banjo Ayeni (USA)                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              

PARADOX OF OUR AGE

 We have bigger houses but smaller families; more conveniences, but less time

 We have more degrees, but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgement,

 We have more experts, but more problems,

 We have more medicines for our ailments, but less healthiness.

 We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet our new neighbour.

 We built more computers to hold information, to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication;

 We have become long in quantity but short on quality.

 These are times for fast foods but slow in digestion.

 Tall man but short character.

 Steep profits but shallow relationships.

 It's a time when there is much in the window, but nothing in the room.

 We all claimed to love each other and religious, but the rate of hate and lack of trust among nations, tribes, clans, associates, business partners, spouses, families, friends and acquaintances is astronomically higher than before.

 PARADOX OF OUR AGE INDEED.

Author: Banjo Ayeni (USA)

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Instructions on Christian Marriage

 This morning I meditated on the Holy Book 1 Corinthians 7 vs1-40. I found some of the verses very intriguing and I thought I’d share them on here. Apostle Paul was a man of God and God used him marvellously to speak to the people of Corinth, the Corinthians. In these scriptures I noticed that whenever Apostle Paul addressed his church he would make it clear whether his instructions were of God or his own opinions. In those instances he would say something like ‘I, Not the Lord’ or ‘Not I, but the Lord’ so as to distinguish which was which. I feel very relieved that Apostle Paul did make that declaration in his speech to the Church…so as to eradicate unnecessary confusion.

 I want to believe that Apostle Paul was like the spiritual leaders of our days, in his own church at the time. Forgive me if this comparison is offensive to some readers. Apostle Paul in 1Corinthians 7 vs 28 said “…but those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this”. Apostle Paul reckoned that when one is married one would be faced with so many concerns and worries so much that one’s focus on God would either diminish or be divided. In view of this, he preferred if one doesn’t marry and spare himself/herself of these troubles as there are more eternal rewards in focusing on God rather than focusing on marriage or loved ones. BUT for those who cannot exercise sexual self-control he advised that they get married rather than burn in passions. Largely, God Himself spoke through Apostle Paul in verse 10 saying “ To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife”. When God created Adam He said “ It is not good for the man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him”-Genesis 2 vs 18. When you compare where God stands with marriage, He’d always wanted it, planned it and ensure suitable partners for His own children. Although Jesus Christ concurred that Divorce could be issued because of the hardness of our hearts….not because He wanted it or agreed it. Contrary to these, Apostle Paul had pity on human being and advised that it’s better not to be married so as to spare us from all the troubles that marriage breeds.

 Now where exactly am I going with all these explanations? Many times I have seen and heard people quoting scriptures from the Bible out of context or without bothering to examine whose voice it was they were adhering to. I understand that there are at least 4 different voices in the Bible, that of satan, human being, Jesus’ voice, God’s voice (through His Spirit). But we often fail to find out which of these voices we are reading about, all we care about is that as long as the write up is from the Bible it is Holy and sanctioned. Many people spoke in the Bible, King of This, King of That, Job, David , Solomon, the People, even Donkey and Snake did speak etc….

In as much as Apostle Paul was entitled to his opinion about issues, I think it is left to us if we want to agree or disagree with his opinions. But most importantly I urge us to always check God’s words or instructions first on any issues before we seek or rest for others’ opinions. I understand where Apostle Paul was coming from when he advised against marriage but the same time I disagree with him that ‘there’s no marital trouble beyond God’s solution and Power’. Although marriage alone is not the way to fulfilment or eternal life but it is a union ordained by God which glorifies God in all aspects…and should not be compromised. With the way God had created us, I want to believe that 97% of human beings would burn in passion if not married, and that makes it important that we must marry and reproduce. Whom we marry and how we marry are the things we want to be careful about, not to be ‘unequally yoked’  so that we may have blissful marriage and glorify God. If God hates divorce and He really wants us to remain married, why would Paul think that the same God is not capable to see us through the troubles he referred to? Although Apostle Paul had a good intention and offered his advice in good faith, but that should not suffice and surpass the ‘Will’ of God for us. However, we must come to a realisation that Marriage will not solve all our problems, and neither would it be the source of all our problems. Marriage alone doesn’t hold two people together, but commitment. Commitment to Christ and to each other despite conflicts and problems. Whether married or single, we must be content with our situation and focus on Christ, not only on loved ones, to help address our problems.

 Conclusively, for the fact that your Pastor shares his views or opinion on issues, does not mean God had spoken. Always employ your brain, intelligence and spiritual mind to analyse issues before accepting any advice. May God Help Us All.

Author: Lara Hanson-Brown.

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HOW TO VALUE A WOMAN

A woman is specially designed by God to play a helping role; she is to help to support and lead. Without a woman, reproduction is impossible. Each time you disvalue a woman, you disregarded her Maker.
Women have been disvalued from generation to generation especially in our culture and in Africa. This is the plan of the enemy not just to affect the women but to bring short the glory of her man, and to reduce the power of togetherness.
A lot goes wrong, when you start to disvalue your woman. That African tradition of mistreating women is not for the good of the man or the home; by mistreating your woman you are only removing the glory God has placed on your life. The word says “…for the woman is the glory of a man…” and it further says that a man is the glory of God. That is why God places much value on us to the point of giving His only Son in other to get us back. This is the same way you should work so hard to value and respect your woman; because without her, your life is void of favor and glory.
Many men because of cultural background see women as inferior whether spoken or not, they feel they are superior to women. But that is for people living under a cursed life. One of the ways you know if you are living under the blessed life is the way you see women.
God created man and woman equally and blessed them together at the same time. Before He created the woman, there was no place recorded in the Bible that He blessed Adam. It was when Eve came that blessing came. “Be fruitful, multiply and replenish the earth, have dominion…”. This also means that without a woman, your blessings are limited. He starts clearly “Whosoever finds a woman finds a good thing and obtains favor from ME”. There is no male or female spirit before God. They are the same before Him.
If you are still ruling over your wife or you believe you are superior to her, you are still under the curse; you are not living a blessed life. When you are above the curse then everything Christ came to redeem us from, you will happily embrace.
If Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the law then the woman is not an exception. Man and woman were initially created equal, sin came into them and the consequence to the woman was that her desire should be to her husband and he will rule over her. Now, Christ has taken us back to the original intention of God on relationship.

The Bible says, “The man is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church”. Christ showing you example of leadership says in His word, “…As he is in heaven, so we are on earth”.
The Trinity (God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit) do not all have the same functions. They have different roles but they are equal, no one is inferior to the other. So also is a man and woman.

Most men are yet to have a glimpse of how God intended to bless them. If a man does not honour the special gift God gave him, He will not bless him with much. The Word states it clearly “If you do not honour your wife (woman), I God will not hear your prayers.” Until you learn to honour your wife, you will not get the blessings marriage is supposed to deliver to you. People do not see the favour promised in marriage because they go into marriage with a wrong perception; this has disvalued the power of togetherness in marriage. Your wife is a gift from God to you; she has a different role to play in your life. Never abuse, disvalue or disrespect her. She is a special pearl designed to add a special fragrance to your life. If you learn to honour the women God has given you i.e. your wife, mother, daughters, and sisters, your heaven will be opened. No Women should allow herself to be disvalued by any man.


Author: Olatunbi Hanson Oludare

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MEN PLEASE STAND UP AND APPLAUD…….

Every man just stand up now and applaud because I am sure you are going to agree with this article.

 So many men have had to endure the constant nagging of a woman. Some women just don’t know when to stop. They go on and on and on as if their mouths are incapable of becoming tired (except for when you ask for that special sexual act). It’s as if they took Nagging 101 and some woman managed to brainwash them that this is a necessary evil capable of getting them what they want.

 At what point will we woman accept that nagging does not work. Yes it may get you results temporarily but it continues to cause greater damage to the relationship. All that b**tching and moaning…(allow me to rephrase that and take a less harsh tone). Complaining and being negative will just create more aggravation and division within the relationship. A lot of times the response and reaction that you get is simply a man’s attempt to shut you the hell up. Some don’t bother even trying because they figure you will just find something else to nag about later. Husbands no longer want to rush home because they don’t want to deal with their wives mouths (even though he will still catch hell for not coming home in a timely manner). Men learn tuning out techniques just to avoid the negativity coming out her mouth. Why do you think many men just hear “womp womp womp” when the woman talks. He doesn’t bother trying to pay attention, he just tries to listen for keywords and hopes you don’t ask any questions about the discussion when you are done. We have to understand and accept that nagging is counterproductive.

 So I know what you are saying ladies, “if he wouldn’t act so stupid, or he did what I asked then I wouldn’t need to start nagging him” and I completely understand your position. I understand it is tough to resist the temptation of talking his ear off because you feel he is not properly cooperating with you. It’s just that there is a much more effective way to communicate to him. You are a woman and you have been given certain feminine abilities that can easily sway a man into doing what you ask of him. Packaging your message in a positive, loving, and caring matter will make the world of difference in making him receptive to it. Like the saying goes, “you can catch more bees with honey”, so stop throwing mud and expecting something positive to come from that. When anybody feels attacked, talked down to, or disrespected, they will not be as receptive. As stated earlier, even if they give you what you want, you are actually causing long-term damage that will lead to other issues. I know some will say well I tried being nice but he still doesn’t get it. My answer to that is; never let a person causes you to take the negative route. Remain on the high road and if you are in relationship and being positive does not work, then maybe you are just with the wrong guy.

As I always say, men do need to do better. If men say they are going to do something, then they need to do it. Men must be men of or words, and give our women less reason to even consider nagging them . With that said, you ladies are not excused from taking this behavior. Before you start-up with all that noise, ask yourself this question “would I be receptive to this approach if it was me?” Any of you that say yes are full of crap! Nobody likes this negative approach; therefore everyone needs to learn to stop using it. The more you let love lead you, the more love you will find. Move your relationship in a better direction, take a positive approach and stop nagging!

 As Always Lots of Love and Buckets of Blessing.

 Dr. Simone Myrie Certified Life & Relationship Coach

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  1. New way to look at negative emotions
  2. Secret of a Happy Marriage......by Faluyi John

Secret of a Happy Marriage

“She knows I'm the husband. She respects me, and reverences me and loves me and helps me fulfil my calling. I celebrate her because the most expensive thing in life is to marry a pretty girl that wants to be celebrated; they don't take nonsense. If you don't want trouble, please celebrate her. When I came back from schooling in America, my wife said to me, hide those certificates, nobody wants to know how educated you are. They want to know how many people have been healed and delivered and set free from bondage by the anointing of God deposited in you.

Secondly, you lose to win in marriage. Even when your wife has wounded or hurt you please don't emphasise it, de-emphasise it. Make sure you put money into her hand even though she has money and do it weekly. Thirdly, when she asks you for money give her more than she asked for and fourthly, when she dresses up for service, turn, ponder and celebrate her; don't just look at her as though you are a muumuu. Say to her you are gorgeously dressed; you are mesmerising me greatly. 

Fifth, accept her relations and her parents particularly; take care of them as you take care of your own parents. If she has a brother invest in that brother, if she has a sister invest in her sister; they will always speak for you because they have eaten your food. No man eats your food without giving you praise. So make sure you invest in those areas. Sixth, love her children. It's very confusing that men love women but women celebrate children, they adore children. To a woman it's a beginning of her unending laughter, so if you want your wife to love you love her children, and take care of them. Send them to good schools and celebrate them. 

My wife says to me, 'on the crusade platform you are a big man of God but in this house you are not a big man of God you are just a husband and a father. So don't walk in here as though you are under anointing. The demons stop in the crusade ground, here we are for celebration. So anytime you walk through the door forget whatever exploits you did at the crusade ground; here you are just an ordinary husband; don't act as a super preacher because the crowd has gone, only we are left.

Author: Faluyi John

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 NEW WAY TO LOOK AT NEGATIVE EMOTIONS

By: Simone Myrie

There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.

 Positive and happy emotions affect our body in ways that provide us with health and healing. When we are happy, our heart rate slows, our breath is relaxed and deep and our blood pressure goes down. On the contrary, what we label as negative and painful emotions, affect our body in the exact opposite way. Our blood pressure soars, our breathing becomes rapid and shallow as we gear up for the fight.

 We realize that living a life without emotions would be a non-human life indeed. We all need to feel the richness and fullness that all of our experiences bring. We have no problem feeling the love toward a helpless infant when we hold one in our arms. We love the feeling of inspirational music and a serene mountain scene or a sunrise. No one has issues with feeling deeply what we label as ‘positive’ feelings and emotions.

 Flip the coin and no one wants to deeply feel their ‘negative’ emotions that bring them pain. We immediately try to avoid or dismiss strongly negative emotions. Why is that so? Is it that we have not been taught an appropriate method for emotional release or that we believe that we do not have an appropriate outlet for our emotions? Is it because strong and negative emotions bring us pain and painful memories? Is it because our healthcare providers have not taught us how emotions affect our body?

 I am suggesting a new way to look at your ‘negative’ emotions. I am suggesting that you feel them deeply versus denying them! You might think I am a nut, right? Maybe so. But I hope to show you how emotions affect our body. I hope to convince you that emotional release is a necessary thing for your health.

 Emotional Release is Paramount to Your Health

 All of us have suppressed our emotions at one time or another. In fact, most of us develop life-long habits of emotional suppression. We do not realize how emotions affect our body. Our parents, or socialization has required us to behave in certain ways. We all know the consequences of expressing raw emotions in certain situations. None of us would be able retain our relationships, in love, in work or anywhere if we expressed every strong emotion we felt! It is appropriate and healthy to curtail our emotions in the situations that would get us fired, or destroy our relationships and so forth. The very emotions that we suppress in our adult situations all too often are expressed later as we take them out on our children. Because of our authority over our children, it is all too easy to do. And since all of us were children once, we have been the objects of adult emotions. In order to be loved, as children, we learn the ways of adults very quickly. If, as children, we show emotions that our parents are not equipped to handle or the emotions that they are trying to suppress, we get beaten, disciplined or ignored or have love withdrawn from us.

 We learn quickly that “big boys don’t cry,” or “be brave for mama,” or “get over it,” or “don’t touch yourself there,” or “you ask too many questions,’ or “you talk too much,” etc. If this doesn’t sound familiar, you can probably write your own. Since our parents learned how to suppress their emotions, most often they are totally unable to handle these same emotions. Is it a surprise that parents are unable to handle their children’s emotions? As a result we all learn quickly from our role models to suppress our emotions as well. This is denying that you have the emotions, looking the other direction as if they did not exist. When we do this we take no thought to how emotions affect our body!  All of this is done at an subconscious level – we do not think as to how emotions affect our body, it just happens.

Feel It and Heal It!But your emotions need an outlet. They will come out one way or another, because they are part of who you are. You may believe that you have suppressed them, but instead your body has absorbed them, and is trying to grab your attention by expressing these emotions for you in symptoms, injuries and/or dis-ease.

 This is how emotions really affect your body.

 Instead of feeling your emotions, you deny them. It is your mind that denies the emotions existence. The denial merely buries them deeper into your body and into your soul. If we are our cells, and all our experiences of life are stored in our cells including our emotions, what is it that you wish to keep there forever? Negative, denied emotions? The body does not know the difference between a thought, an emotion, a hormone, a biochemical or a molecule of any type. They are all sublimely intertwined!  Negative, strong emotions, or negative ‘energy’ however you wish to label it will remain inside your body-mind-soul and become body-mind-soul issues if you do not deal with them. Dis-ease, pain, injury and all manner of negative energy will manifest itself in your cells, in your body. This is how emotions affect our body!

 Some people are able to release their emotional energy through physical activity. That is why ‘movement therapy’ (See Intuitive Movement) is so important in our lives for emotional release. These folks are able to feel the energy through movement and heal it by releasing it this way. They may not understand how emotions affect their body, but they do know that they feel much better if they exercise.  Meditation or Centered Prayer is also of extreme importance. If we use physical activity in a meditative fashion, we can really accomplish two things at once. For those of us who’s contact with ourselves is so limited, those of us who have difficulty stilling our minds, physical activity may be the only way we can access our body-mind-soul. For the rest of us a Meditation or Centered Prayer practice is also extremely helpful or combination of both.  Whichever method we choose, even if it is just hitting the bed or a punching bag with our fists, we need to find a way to release our strong emotions and heal them. We need to feel them fully, release them and heal them. We need to "feel it and heal it!" Otherwise, the emotions affect our body in a negative fashion as they build up within us.

Emotions are Information Only!

 In order to lead happy, joyous and healthy lives, we must claim our emotions, accept them without judgment and learn how to fully feel them. Only in doing this can we truly release them so they cannot block our energy, and do not build up in our bodies. Emotions are neither right nor wrong. They are neither good nor bad! They just are. We must learn to attach no judgments to our feelings. Emotions are information only. They let us know our inner condition, our inner desires, our true selves. This is a very importance concept to understand if we are to understand how emotions affect our body.  So how do we attach no judgment to our feelings? First, we need to be aware we have emotions. Most of us know we have them - we are just unaware of the extent that we deny them and suppress them, or pretend that they don’t exist. We don't understand how emotions affect our body. We learned from our parents that strong emotions are unacceptable so we hide them.

 Our emotions also may really frighten us, because to be consciously aware of them might require that we do something about them. The actions required to abate the emotions might be unacceptable to us. These emotions, if conscious might nudge us to look for other employment or another relationship.

 We can still experience our emotions deeply, release them and let them go. We don’t have to store them up. We can understand how emotions affect our body and how they affect us. We can learn to change our response to our emotions, when we cannot change the situation that elicited the emotion.  We will never control the external world. We can only change ourselves and how we respond to the situation. We need to learn to detach from situations that raise our emotions by learning to recognize the emotion, feel it briefly but fully, and then letting it go. When I feel my ire rise, I have learned to take a deep breath and say to myself, “feel it and heal it!”

Staying aware of our emotions is paramount. If we fail to do this and fail to learn to respond in healthy ways, then our emotions affect our body in negative ways. When you become stressed, your body releases a stress hormone called cortisol. This is how emotions affect our body. I have read that cortisol or the stress hormone that is activated in our brains in response to emotional situations lasts a mere 90 seconds in our bodies, after the brain releases it. If the emotion persists beyond 90 seconds it is because we choose to hold it and make it last! Now there is power! We can use this information to learn how emotions affect our body! Even though we cannot control our chemical response to the trigger, we can choose what happens next!  If you can just wait out the 90 seconds, by feeling the emotion fully and deeply, and then release it we could change our stress patterns. I suggest breathing deeply, at least 10 times, say to yourself, “feel it and heal it!” and count to 10 and hopefully 90 seconds will have passed!  If you need to clench your fists, or beat yourself on the leg first, to help you fully feel the emotion, just do it! Hopefully you aren’t in a meeting at the time! But if you are, you can close your eyes, imagine the fire burning in your heart, and then douse it with water, and watch the smoke dissipate as you say to yourself, “feel it and heal it!” This will prevent any future build-up in your bodily storage of emotions and pain. Your releasing thoughts will create the physical health, the physical matter for health. Remember the line: “Thought creates matter.” The body knows no difference between your thoughts (emotions) and the stress hormone you released.

How to Heal our Bodily Stored Pain

 Since we now know how emotions affect our body, what do we do about the physical pain that is already stored up in our bodies from our past emotions? (Body Window) This is where the body exercises through Intuitive Movementlike yoga and foam rolling come in. The process for releasing physical pain is the same as the process for releasing emotional pain, except now the body is the manifestation of our stored emotional pain.  The body is now our key to find what ourBody Windowis trying to say to us, to tell us where our body-mind-soul issues are. After you have done your body scan (Developing Intuition by Using Your Body) and when you know where your body issues are you are ready to listen to your Body Window. When you are in your Intuitive Movement,in a stretch or applying pressure to the muscle, when you reach the edge where the pain comes, try to stay with the pain. As you breathe in and stay in the moment, you are really feeling the pain. Make sure the pain is just mild, just at the edge. If you do it right, the pain should ease with the combined deep breathing and stretch or pressure. If you want to and are ready to go deeper, move deeper or apply just a little more pressure and repeat the process. Slowly and with meditative breath, the muscle will release and you will be left with a feeling of peace. This process is what my trainer, calls "body sensing" and it is truely a liberating, self-awareness process.

Just Go With the Flow

Don’t worry if you don’t feel any emotions during this process. Since you now know how emotions affect your body, trust that your body will remember that your mind listened and were aware and your body will feel better. The process of fully feeling and releasing this embodied emotional pain may take time and practice. If you continue to work on this, and don’t give up, you will reap physical and emotional rewards. You may discover insights about yourself you did not know were there. If you are truly seeking, you will surely find! The messages are there waiting in your body, waiting until you are ready to hear them! Practice this body awareness technique and listen through your Body Window, to what your body is saying to you.

 Just keep the practice quiet and reflective. Set aside time to do your Intuitive Movement when you will not be disturbed, and set a timer if needed to decrease your worry about time constraints. I believe that a minimum of 30-40 minutes is necessary to really truly work an area. You will find that the more you do this, the more time you will want to take for your health and happiness. The practice will become addictive.

 All of the benefits of feeling it and healing it will come to us because we now know how emotions affect our body!

Just feel it and heal it!

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  1. Vanity
  2. Revealed by Banjo Ayeni - How to be a Successful father
  3. Woman or a wife?..by Faluyi John
  4. Prof Wole Soyinka - What hinders his return to Nigeria

VANITY! ALL IS VANITY!!

By: Faluyi John

PLS READ THIS.....As soon as you die,your identity becomes a"Body". People use phrases like"Bring the Body","Lower the Body in the Grave","Take the Body to the Graveyard" etc.People Don't Even call you by your Name whom you tried to Impress the whole Life.Moral:- "Live a Life to Impress the Creator not the Creation!!Stop bragging on top of nothing,Ur Q10 =vanityUr brazilian hair =vanityUr figure8 =vanityUr six packs =vanityUr pink lips =vanity!!Ur money = vanity!!Even the houses & cars u flaunting on ur dp =VANITY!!!Stay humble! And keep your head up ..!!! Live and laugh and don't make others sad ‘cos life is simple!

Author: Faluyi John                                                                                                                                                            

REVEALED BY BANJO AYENI: HOW TO BE A SUCCESSFUL  FATHER

There are five major things that qualifies we men to be a good father to our children.

 1. Make Time for Your Family

 As a father, how do you show your children that they are important to you? Surely there are many things you do for your children, including the sacrifices you make to feed them and provide them with an adequate home. You would not do such things if your children were not important to you. Yet, if you do not spend significant amounts of time with your children, they might conclude that you care more for other things, such as your job, your friends, or your hobbies, than you do for them.

 When should a father begin to spend time with his children? A mother begins to form a bond with her child while it is still in the womb. Some 16 weeks after conception, an unborn baby might begin to hear. At this stage a father too can start to build his unique relationship with his unborn child. He can listen to the baby’s heartbeat, feel it kick, talk to it, and sing to it.

 Bible Principle: In Bible times men were personally involved in the education of their children. Fathers were encouraged to spend time with their children on a regular basis, as is made evident by the Bible’s words at Deuteronomy 6:6, 7, which say: “These words that I am commanding you today must prove to be on your heart; and you must inculcate them in your son and speak of them when you sit in your house and when you walk on the road and when you lie down and when you get up.”

2. Good Fathers Are Good Communicators

 In order to communicate effectively with your children, you must be a careful listener. You need to cultivate the ability to listen without overreacting.

 If your children think that you will lose your temper quickly and be judgmental, they will have little incentive to express their inner feelings to you. But if you listen to them calmly, you will show that you are genuinely interested in them. They will in turn be far more likely to share their precious thoughts and feelings with you.“Every man must be swift about hearing, slow about speaking, slow about wrath.” (James 1:19) Fathers who apply this Bible principle are able to communicate better with their children.

 3. Give Loving Discipline and Commendation

 Even when you feel frustrated or angry, the discipline you administer should be an expression of loving concern for the long-term welfare of your child. It includes advice, correction, education, and chastisement when needed.

 Furthermore, discipline is much more effective when a father commends his children regularly. An ancient proverb says: “As apples of gold in silver carvings is a word spoken at the right time for it.” (Proverbs 25:11) Commendation enriches a child’s character. Children blossom when they are acknowledged and appreciated. A father who looks for opportunities to give commendation will help to build confidence in his children and motivate them not to give up trying to do what is right. Bible Principle: “You fathers, do not be exasperating your children, so that they do not become downhearted.”—Colossians 3:21.

 4. Love and Respect Your Wife.

 The way a father exercises his role as a husband is certain to affect children. One group of experts on child development explains: “One of the best things a father can do for his children is to respect their mother. . . . A father and mother who respect each other and let their children know it provide a secure environment for them.”—The Importance of Fathers in the Healthy Development of Children. *

 5. Apply God’s Practical Wisdom.

 Fathers who have heartfelt love for God can give their children a most precious heritage—an intimate relationship with their heavenly Father -Awake March 2013. It is obvious that there is more involved in fatherhood than these five points and that, realistically, even when you try your best to be a good father, you are not going to be a perfect one. But to the extent that you apply these principles in a loving and balanced way, you really can be a good father. *

 I am striving hard to be the best father I can possibly be.

 To have a prosperous family life......you  must earn it.

Author: Bayo AYENI (USA)

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WOMAN OR A WIFE?

 

By Faluyi John

 It is not every woman that is qualified to be a wife, being a wife is much more complex than to be an ordinary woman. A wife is woman but not every woman is a wife material. A Wife's position can be likened to a pleasant fragrant, salt and sweet taste which must not lose her value. A wife is an important personnel and backbone of every home. You are there to give life, love, care and wonderful touches to the life of your husband and children. Family life is more enjoyable with a woman of integrity- a wife. It is not every married woman that performs the role of a wife. Any woman that fails in her duties at home is no more a wife. A wife is a female adult that knows she has husband to care for. The word “wife” is a title given to an extraordinary woman, who values her position and stand up to her responsibilities at when due. Although the position is more than a title but character influence over her home. As a single lady, don’t prepare yourself to be one of the women in marriage, but a wife to be.

 What do you do to transcend from an ordinary woman to a responsible wife:

 1. Respect your husband

 2. Realize yourself as a prayer warrior of the family

 3. To be an outstanding wife, you have to endure many things so that you can enjoy many things

 4. Don’t substitute the love of your husband with your children

 5. Be a caring mother

 6. Be familiar with the do’s and don’ts of your husband

 7. Create time for your home no matter how tight your schedule may be

 8. Be diligent, moderate and polite

 9. Always pay homage to your in-laws

 10. Let courtesy guide you always

 11. Be very neat

 12. Be reserved and have limited friends

 13. Don’t be a trouble maker in the street

 14. Always be ready to make peace with your husband

 15. When you are hurt, don’t deny him what you suppose to give to him

 Food for thought: if your husband were to repay your dowry, will he add to it or subtract from it? He can only add to it base on your contributions in his life. Before you can see the glory of revival in your marriage, you have your roles to play as a wife.

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Why Nigerians in Diaspora are reluctant returning HOME

  • The society will not support them to fulfil their dreams and aspirations .
  • Poor quality of education that would affect their children's future achievemnts and competition.
  • Lack of regular or constant electricity supply.
  • Manipulation of election and census through tribal and religious fault lines.
  • Existence of corruption that is like a cloak in which the nation is clothed.
  • Failed  generation! The failure that is so deeply ingrained and endemic, it is so evident in every sector, yet none underscores it better than the dilapidated primary schools, the valueless secondary schools, and the cult-ridden tertiary institutions – everything has decayed to the worst level.
  • Lack of fundamental human rights.
  • Crawling health system with life-threatening diseases, doctor’s negligence, quackery, and incompetence.
  • Fear of crater-like potholes on the roads that could end lives or cause severe accidents.
  • Dangerous Airlines that knows no human values.
  • Corrupt judiciary system that bears no  mercy nor conscience.
  • Lack of good and rewarding employment that needs no Godfathers to get.
  • Political power corruption and abuse of Public Office.

Author:Lara Hanson-Brown

 

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Have you ever felt like just giving up?

Have you ever felt like just giving up? On the relationship or the workout plan, or the book? Or the business? Instead of doing that - I have what could be a better suggestion! 

I’m always going for a goal. A goal in my personal life. A  goal in my professional life.  I love to set goals and then go make them reality. And some goals are easier for me to make reality than others. But no matter what the goal is, there is a part of every journey that defines whether I can make it happen or not.  And that’s what I choose to do when things get hard, when I get frustrated, or when I get hurt. 

This past weekend, my lower back went out (again). Yes, I have awesome doctors and energy healers. Yes, I know what this part of the body symbolizes when it acts up. Yes, I do everything I can to prevent it from happening – and sometimes, it just happens. I know that my physical fitness level depends on what I do now. In the past, I would choose to stop. There is a major difference between stopping and slowing down.  

Slowing down in a time like this is the right thing to do, stopping is not. I’ve been scared of the uncertainty that all this change brings and because of that, it’s very easy to use setbacks such at these as reasons to stop. But what I’ve learned is that even taking the effort back to small, tiny baby steps is better – because it keeps the momentum moving forward. And remember physics – objects at rest tend to stay at rest, objects in motion tend to stay in motion. This is why even a small amount of action make a huge difference; it keeps you in the game, it keeps you moving forward. I know this is short and sweet, but I hope that it packs a punch, because getting this can be a total game changer.

So – question – where in your life have you stopped when you could be taking simple baby steps forward? Where are you scared to move forward? Where can you take just one small step today? Not a huge one . . . just a small one?

A better idea than just quitting...... (Smile)laugh

Let's make it a GREAT day and DON'T GIVE UP!

Lots of LOVE,

Dr Simone Myrie